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I want to share a fun little exercise I did this week that gave me some much needed clarity in a world full of chaos.

If you have a pen and paper handy, grab that. If you don’t, just play along in your mind.

Now the fun part-

Make a list your most UNDESIRABLE qualities. (Wait, what? How is this fun?!)

Ok, I’ll start you off with a few of mine:

I can be neurotic, stressed, overly enthusiastic, totally unmotivated, tired, lost, closed off, too chatty, sad, crabby, weak, bloated, worried, filterless, moody… and all of these within any given 5 minute period. (My poor friends)

Now list yours. What are the most “undesirable” things about you, by society’s standards?

We all have undesirable traits. That’s the beauty of being human.

And I promise there’s a point to this torture. 😉

Once you’re done, look back at your list and think of the person or people in your life who’ve seen EVERY SINGLE ONE of these parts of you.

The people you’ve trusted enough to show your bloated, moody, neurotic side. Maybe it’s one person, maybe it’s ten. The number doesn’t matter. There have been times in my life when my list was just me, myself and God. No one else. The number of people isn't what matters.

What matters is that we're able to see who we feel completely at ease being REAL around. Who accepts us EXACTLY as we are. These people are rare. These people are priceless.

These people, my friend, are your tribe.

These people are KEY to your making your dreams a reality. The people who lift you up. The people who will remind you in your moments of doubt (which we ALL have) that


That you WILL reach your goals.

These are the people who add to your life, instead of depleting you. The angels, not the vampires.

These are the people to invest your time and energy in. To treasure. Do you reach out to them once in a while? Do you tell them how much they mean to you?

During this time of uncertainty, it’s easy to get caught up in what’s going on in our own life and let our friendships fall to the side. This exercise made me realize that I have done exactly that.

I want to challenge you to join me in choosing one person from your list every day and reach out to them in whatever way feels natural to you. Maybe they’re struggling with something right now and could use your help or words of encouragement. Maybe you’ve never expressed how grateful you are for them. Now’s your chance. Do this every day until you’ve reached out in some way to every person on your list. And then do it all over again.

For most of us, that’s the easy part. The part that feels good and comes naturally once we put the effort into it. But here’s an equally important part that doesn’t come so easily for most of us-

Allowing ourselves to RECEIVE.

Being open to receiving the support of the people who love us. Their … ergh… help. That’s a tough one for me. As my closest friends would confirm, I try to do everything myself. I hate asking for and accepting help. (Sound familiar?)

But that’s part of the power of having a tribe.

You might be excellent at one thing, but you have a friend who is better at something else. Working together, you both come out stronger.

When they’re weak, you hold them up. When you’re down, they lift YOU.

Our tribes are the breeding ground for our empowerment, because they are the one place where we can be 100% ourselves without fear of judgement.

The place where we can explore ALL our sides, not just the ones we feel safe showing the world.

And in exploring those parts of ourselves and feeling accepted for them, we begin to accept them in ourselves, and we grow more confident in showing them to the world.

When we are truly ourselves, unapologetically REAL, incredible things start to happen around us. Our being real gives others permission to be real too. And those around them feel comfortable being real too... And on and on and on… So many ripples created...

So be YOU. Moody, bloated, incredible you.

Your tribe adores your YOU-ness.

And those who don’t? Girlfriend, they ain’t yo tribe.

But you just might inspire them to be real too. 😉

Thank you for being my tribe.

xx Jen

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