It’s a bird! It’s a plane! Nah, it’s just us. Up there lighting up the sky, crushing our goals.
“How?” They ask, shielding their eyes from the blinding light. “How does she do it?”
To that, we smile and let them in on the secret to our success, “Happiness.”
Ok yes, I know we don’t typically feel like superheroes in everyday life. But I’m going to say it right here-
MAKING OURSELVES HAPPY IS ONE OF THE FASTEST WAYS TO FIND OUR POWER.
Why the shouty caps? And why do I talk about prioritizing our own happiness so much?
Because it’s not only our right, it’s our RESPONSIBILITY to do the things that fulfill us and make us happy, so we can give our best to the world.
Let me come back down to Earth for a sec-
Have you ever noticed how some mornings you wake up from a restful night’s sleep and feel great. From the moment your feet hit the floor things just seem to flow. There’s ease to your morning, your family members are cheerful, you make it out of the house unrushed, on time and without spilling your coffee? Your morning drive is easy, your favorite songs play on the radio. Everyone you interact with is cheerful… or at least not rude. Work comes easily and you accomplish more by noon than you do on most other days by 5:00.
Speaking of those “other” days, they go something like this-
We sleep like crap because we were trying to figure out how we’re going to keep all the balls we’re trying to juggle in the air. We wake up grumpy and hangry and tired and achy. We shuffle to the kitchen only to find we’re out of coffee (How did I forget to buy coffee yesterday?!) The family comes downstairs demanding everything except the clothes we're wearing from us. We yell at everyone about being late, rush to the door only to realize we have no damn clue where our keys are. We’re running late, everyone’s snippy and all we want to do is go back to bed and start over. And we accomplish nothing.
How does this happen?
It starts with our belief that we need to be everything to everyone… to the point where we lose ourselves.
We’re so busy trying to not let anyone down, that we end up letting ourselves down. And we can only continue this way for so long before we burn out, and all those balls come crashing to the ground. Along with our exhausted souls.
I dropped my balls last week. (My teenage boys would have a field day with that one.)
Anyhoo, I just couldn’t do it anymore. I was tired. I was grumpy. I was so very sad and I had no idea why. I felt restless and rudderless and totally unmotivated. I felt disconnected from my source and a little like I was losing my mind.
And then I realized I’d done it again – I had stopped focusing on MY happiness. It’s so easy to forget (especially for women.)
It feels so much more natural to take care of everyone else instead of ourselves. But it’s not sustainable. Eventually we WILL drop the balls.
And I did. Big time.
So, I decided to do something about it.
Since I had already alienated the men in my home with my grumpy gloomy bleh-ness, I decided to take the whole weekend FOR MYSELF.
I slept until I felt like getting up. Ate what I wanted. Went for a run. Saw a movie. Commandeered the TV for all shows girly, and I read... Two. Whole. Books.
And I let my hubs tend to the boys’ needs… because, duh, they’re his kids too. (Why do I always forget this?)
Was my family inconvenienced? Yup.
But here’s the thing. I’d been miserable to be around for days (probably weeks, if I’m being honest) as the resentment and lack of taking time for ME built up. I’d been dragging everyone around me down with my low energy and dark mood.
But in just TWO DAYS I was able to return to ME. One weekend of focusing on what I wanted, what I needed. Not my kids, not my husband… ME.
And Monday morning I was able to pick those balls back up and juggle like the badass circus clown I am! Bonus, the men in my home seemed happy to be around me again. Even the DOG seemed happier!
As a result, we all started this new week from a place of peace and laughter- a huge difference from the way we ended last week.
All because I took a break and made time for ME.
I could have continued in my dark mood over the weekend, resentfully responding to every “Mom?” and “Hey babe?” with a teeth gritting “Yes honey? What do you need?” out of some misguided sense of martyrdom.
But had I done that, this week would have started out even darker than last week, for the whole family AND the dog.
Though on the surface it might seem selfish, taking this time to re-center is mind-blowingly selfless. That's the beauty of self-care.
When we make our happiness our first priority, we serve better. We spread light. We lift up those around us. Our families feel our stability and strength and joy and they take that out into the world feeling stronger as they pursue their own dreams.
When we’re happy, we add positive energy and love in the world, something the world can definitely use right now. (Side note: when we’re unhappy, overworked or resentful, we do the exact opposite.)
So once again, here’s your permission to PRIORITIZE YOUR HAPPINESS and your dreams.
And as an added bonus, you’ll be helping to save the world, Wonder Woman.
So take a few minutes today (and every day) to do something that makes you crazy happy… cape or no cape.
Xx Jen
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