Updated: Dec 27, 2022
At the beginning of every year, we are bombarded by the phrase “New Year, New You!”
While I certainly understand wanting to improve upon specific areas of ourselves and our lives, the words “New Year, New You” really bother me.
Some might say it’s just a matter of semantics, but the words we use when we talk about ourselves matter.
I’m going to say that again-
The words we use when we talk about ourselves matter...
...because our words shape our opinions about ourselves even when we aren't aware of it.
Here's the deal:
I don’t want a NEW me, as if there’s something fundamentally wrong with the old me. There’s not! No matter what our situation is at any given moment in life, there is absolutely nothing wrong with us.
Does this mean we stay complacent and let go of our aspirations? Or course not. I’m all about setting goals and striving for our dreams. BUT...
Our goals and dreams don’t require a “new” us. They require THE REAL us.
Sister, we are much more capable of achieving our goals and dreams when we EMBRACE the power that IS and has always been US.
I have many flaws and things I can improve on – we all do! We ALWAYS will! That’s part of the human experience, and it’s the magical place where the most powerful growth happens!
But the important distinction is this: The things we want to improve are not who we are.
Read that again-
The things we want to improve are not WHO we are, and so there's no need for a "new" us.
Once we know and believe this deep in our bones, we will no longer feel the need to become something other than exactly who we are.
once we REMEMBEr how perfect we are - flaws and all - we will stop believing the b.s. telling us how we “should" be.
We don’t need to trade ourselves in for a "new us” just because it’s a new year. Instead, let’s work on remembering who the REAL “us” is -
The "us" that we knew ourselves to be as children, before the messages came barreling at us about what was “wrong” with us and needed to be fixed, or what we “should” or “shouldn’t” do or feel or say or BE.
The REAL us –
Remember this girl?
STRONG (I’m gonna climb all the way up to the TOP of that tree!)
OBSERVANT (Look at that bear in the clouds! Wait it’s changing! It’s a whale now!)
PATIENT (Christmas gifts were well worth waiting 364 days for, am I right?)
GENEROUS (I have two and you don’t have any. Here, take one of mine!)
CONFIDENT (I'm smart enough to do anything!)
LIMITLESS (When I grow up, I’m going to be an astronaut AND a dancer AND a fire fighter AND a nurse AND a mom!)
FEARLESS (Watch me jump off the high dive!)
THIS, my friend, is who we are.
We may have lost touch with that girl; we may have forgotten she even existed in the first place, but she’s still inside us.
Why would we want to trade all that awesomeness for a “new us?!” when the REAL us is so incredibly beautiful and strong and perfectly imperfect.
So instead of resolving to replace ourselves with a “new” us this year, what if we devoted the year to embracing and celebrating the REAL us.
What if we resolved to get to know ourselves again... the REAL us.
What if we resolved to love ourselves, beautiful flaws and all.
What if we resolved to get back in touch with the fearlessness and connection to everyone and everything we felt as kids, before the outside world told us who and what we “should” be.
Resolutions are good. Goals are important. Wanting to become the best version of OURSELVES is amazing.
But trying to make these changes from a place of non-acceptance of ourselves is so much more challenging than making them from a place of love and respect for the incredible person we are.
Each of us has something beautiful and unique to share with the world. When we stop wasting our energy wishing we were different, we will begin to remember just how incredibly powerful we are.
So Maybe the goal isn’t becoming a “new” version of ourselves, but “un-becoming” what the world has told us we “should” be...
...so we can get back to being exactly who we are.
That's where our true power lies.